Childbirth is a very serious event that needs to be experienced together by the parents. But this doesn’t necessarily mean they both have to undergo the labor process.

So, how should the couple decide whether the dad-to-be should be present for the delivery or not?

First of all, the couple must make this decision by mutual agreement. They should decide previously but not hastily. If this is simply fashionable, or they have watched it on TV, that shouldn’t be the reason to do the same thing. It is not a test of your relationship, because each person has an individual psychological perception. After being there in the delivery room, men could have male problems like postnatal depression.

If he has a fear of pain or blood, or if it’s hard for him to endure the suffering of others, then it will a big challenge for him to be present during labor. He may be a lot more anxious than the expectant mom, and his increased anxiety will pass onto her, thus causing more stress and pain. So, rather than being the one needing support, she may appear as the one who gives support in that tough situation.

Right after the child is born the woman has to deliver her placenta. But she will able to do it quickly and smoothly with increased oxytocin, or the hormone of happiness. For that purpose, woman should be relieved and happy and nothing should bother her. But sometimes men want to hold the baby, take photos and talk all the time, hardly holding in their emotions. So, again they may impede the women with their behavior.

So, whatever your decision will be, just remember that it is necessary for the dad to be there after labor. Early contact of father with the baby contributes to forming a lasting bond. Fathers holding the newborn children in their hands are less afraid of the child and feel more confident.

Enjoy your motherhood and fatherhood.

Photo © vbillings

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